A couple of months ago I decided to try a new hairstyle: kinky twists. It was a natural style that didn’t require much upkeep and was great for those sweaty days at the gym. It required no heat and getting ready in the mornings was a breeze. Something about it just made me feel more in touch with my roots. I made sure not to make my twists too much longer than my real hair so that it looked more believable as my own. But after 6 weeks, I couldn’t stand the hairstyle anymore. (That’s how I am with any hairstyle. I like change.)
During the weeks with my kinky twists, I noticed the amount of men that approached me decline. Normally I couldn't go more than 2 days without some guy saying something. Know that my twists were never raggedy, because I know how to do hair myself, and self maintenance is always top priority in my book. I kept them neat, clean and everything else in tact. But men just weren't checking for me as often as before. I noticed that my Caucasian co-workers could not get enough of my unique hairstyle and one even told me she envied my hair. Sad ro say but most of the compliments I got on my hair came from people, especially men, who were not black.
As soon as I stepped out of the hair salon and back to my press & curl I was approached by a group of gentlemen standing outside. I gave my usual wave as I kept walking and said that I couldn’t stop. These same men had seen me walk in the shop with a beanie and shades but now they couldn’t help but speak.
Was it the smell of the salon or the wind blowing my curls that caught their eye? I didn’t feel like I walked any differently with my fresh press so I could only attribute their comments to one change. My new smooth do.
My shoulder length hair flowing in the wind continued to catch the eyes of many men between the shop and my car.
Did I walk differently with straight hair?
Why were men so much more attracted to me now?
3 comments:
Just being honest, I think some women put a little more pep in their step after getting their hair done. If I don't like how my hair looks after I leave the shop, the amount of men who approach me drastically declines; if I walk out acting like I'm the shat and some, I get hollered at.
When I was rocking the short Zhane hairstyle, dudes were coming out the woodworks hollering. Honestly, I was more comfortable with that hairstyle because I didn't have to be concerned about a hair being out of place. Now that it's longer, I'm more conscious of it so the attention has dwindled a tad (not that I care tho; I'm 8 mths pregnant and don't want no one hollering at me LOL).
I don't think it has to do with the "state" of your hair though; more so the confidence level you're emanating...that's just my opinion though :)
I think its a combination of factors. I agree with the above comment that the freshest step ANY black people have is when their hair has been freshly tended to.
That being said, I feel like certain hairstyles give off certain vibe to us Y Chrommers. Hair in low maintenance hair styles like braids and twists gives off the "I'm not worried about my hair" type vibe to most.
But why does she not care ??
Because she's either got a man who doesn't care about how her hair looks or she isn't checkin' for dudes in general.
We spend our entire lives in the pursuit of "The one" and everything is an extension of that. Certain outfits, cars, hair cuts and HAIR DOs say "Here I am, come and get me !!!" While others say, "Ocupado." So while this does change the level of confidence you bop with, it also changes the perception of that confidence by the counterparts.
Assertive Wit-Congratulations on the bundle of joy! I can only speak for myself but I exude confidence 24/7 no matter the state of my hair.
Mr. Fantastic- There is nothing low maintenance about me at all, not saying that I'm high maintenance either. I just mean that I am very particular about the way that I look and the amount of time I put into myself, that includes my natural hairstyles. My current kinky twists require more upkeep than a press and curl ever did. Washing, conditioning and moisturizing every other day is something I hardly consider to be low maintenance. Also factor in the fact that it took me 10 hours to do this hair style and that I will spend another 2-4 hours every two weeks to keep them looking fresh. You've identified one major problem, natural hair has the misconception of being easy.
I'm a confident person, whether in kinky twists or with my hair blowing in the wind, I also believe that I attract a different type of man when I wear my hair this way. Maybe you're right, maybe the misconception men have of this being an, "I don't give a f*** hairstyle" or "I got a man" hairstyle keeps them away. That's one less ignorant mans phone calls I have to ignore.
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